'With a wave bid all certainties goodbye'
Reading corner
Relativity
by Sarah Howe
for Stephen Hawking
When we wake up brushed by panic in the dark
our pupils grope for the shape of things we know.
Photons loosed from slits like greyhounds at the track
reveal light’s doubleness in their cast shadows
that stripe a dimmed lab’s wall — particles no more —
and with a wave bid all certainties goodbye.
For what’s sure in a universe that dopplers
away like a siren’s midnight cry? They say
a flash seen from on and off a hurtling train
will explain why time dilates like a perfect
afternoon; predicts black holes where parallel lines
will meet, whose stark horizon even starlight,
bent in its tracks, can’t resist. If we can think
this far, might not our eyes adjust to the dark?
Healing notes
I think after ages I am sitting before my computer and wondering what I could possibly write about my healing when this week has been spent trying very hard to not lose my mind. With the cats at war with each other, I have withdrawn more and more from everything and hidden in the comfort of what I know. Books and sleep. Alongside a peak in pain, which I am pretty clueless about, I just carry on.
Sometimes this carrying on feels brave. My therapist reminds me. I tell her that I don't want to be brave. I want to rest and not have to work. I want health care that is not obscenely expensive. That I want time and rest. I want a vacation. I don't think I agree with her but I do know doing things when everything feels like shit has become my normal and during weeks like this I would like to change that.
Maybe this year has just been hard and I have spent much of it by myself, learning my body's ways better and understanding how to manage myself. (I wrote and erased a million negative sounding sentences here. Maybe this therapy thing is good :D)
Can you tell me what you do when you want a break but you need to keep going? I would love to hear. <3 What helps you carry on?
Food experiments
It has been a tough week on my body and mind. So I turned to many many comfort food. Bread and eggs. Noodles with eggs. Soup. And of course, morekili.
I don't know if I have put this recipe here before but it is an upma that is made from lassi instead of water.
Mix one cup of rice flour with 3 cups of diluted curd in water with salt. Mix well. Meanwhile fry green chillies in oil and jeera.
Add the rice flour and curd mixture after a while and let it become slightly thick. Then eat :)
Dear you,
It has been a tough tough week in our house with cats not getting along.
I had forgotten what it feels like to live with so much hissing.
Hope your week was good and the coming week is better.
*fingers crossed* for us too.
Love, kindness and warmth,
Nidsitis